Let It Snow x3

Posted by Phantom Mongoose Wed, 13 Feb 2008 18:28:00 GMT

My ode to the greatest time of the year:

winter is
snow and cold and shovels
up yours snow

If only I lived in a land of three seasons, Spring, Summer, and Latesummer. A verdant land lush with life and virility—where mighty ruminants strike together their mighty heads in bold efforts to win the favor of the fairer sex as raging waterfalls all but drown out the playful chitterings of a myriad of diminutive creatures coyling playing meaningless games of fun and frolic.

Which I could ignore while staying inside playing video games all day.

This cannot be so where am I?

Loathing snow removal.

Too cheap to buy a snowblower, I’m left no choice but to clear the old fashioned way—shovels.

Notice that was shovels in the plural. That’s right, I have one shovel (metal blade, straight wooden handle) I use for scraping and pushing, and one shovel (plastic blade, metal curved handle) I use for scooping and throwing. The significance of these facts should be glaring; it speaks of a dismal truth which has gripped my reality.

For what is one when one has specialized tools to be utilized in specialized situations? Tools one knows intimately from purpose to construction, tools deployed in a tactical manner? An Expert!

Ack. Know thyself: I am an expert snow shoveler.